We are bombarded this month, rightly so, with October Breast Cancer Awareness.
Inspiration Avenue challenges you this month to show your pink art. So much out there, so little time.
This post will review some of breast cancer awareness that I have blogged about over the years. Click on the links if you want to read more about breast cancer thoughts (links are under each picture).
Go on over to see more Pink Art here at Inspiration Avenue!
lymphedema, a common side effect of radiation, linked to a previous post here
There are things that we don't want to happen but
have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people
we can't live without but have to let go. ~ Author Unknown
This week, Inspiration Avenue challenges you to post Halloween photographs, recipes, costumes, altered art: anything Halloweeny.
This is the time to get creative with your stuff, be it scary skeletons or sweet pumpkin smiling faces. Go here to join in the fun! Post one or several of your favs and see blogs of others who have taken the challenge.
To get you started on altered art and/or photographs about Halloween, here are a few faces and items from Etsy and Pinterest that may pique your interest.
Source: Gold Panner (Summit County, CO, Historical Society
(A Study -Limbo ID:374 from 2006 Lilly Oncology On Canvas 2006 competition)
It doesn’t interest me to know what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, And if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, For the adventure of being alive. It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrows, If you have been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, Without moving to hide it, or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, If you can dance with wildness and let ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes Without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human. It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to your self, If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul, If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy. I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it is not pretty, every day, And if you can source your own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure, Yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, “Yes!” It doesn’t interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, Weary and bruised to the bone, And do what needs to be done for the children. It doesn’t interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back. It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself And if you truly like the company you keep in empty moments.
Back in the day, embroidery was used as a past time by ladies with leisure. It was a beautiful way to gussy up clothing or even, shall we say, a tea towel?
In Mexico, this holiday takes place on the first and second of November. People take two days out of the year in order to pay their respect to their dead family members and friends. During this celebration, skulls and altars are made, food is placed on graves, and families and friends celebrate the lives of departed children and adults. I really hope that you'll create something this week as a response to El Dia de los Muertos. Whether it's the holiday itself, the Halloween-like feel of the skeletons, or the bright colors that inspire you, I'm looking forward to seeing your creations.
The red petals stand for the vast outpouring of blood; the yellow and black center, the mud and desolation of all battlefields.
The green of the stem is symbolic of the forests, meadows and fields where generations of Americans have perished to make this land free.
The stem represents the courage and determination of our fallen warriors.
The assembled product, a flower, is a symbol of resurrection, which is sure to follow.
In the book The Language of Flowers, poppy means consolation.
A favorite blog read is BJWS; this paragraph is taken from her post found here about poppies.
In the World War I battlefields of Belgium, poppies grew wild amid the ravaged landscape. How could such a delicate flower grow bright and wild surrounded by death and destruction? The overturned soils of battlefield enabled the poppy seeds to be covered, allowing them to thrive and to serve as a reminder of the bloodshed during that and future wars. The use of poppies as a remembrance for those who served in war was inspired by the poem "In Flanders Fields" written by Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae of the WWI Canadian forces in 1915.
Poppies have been painted, photographed and written about since time immemorial. Show us a picture or write about poppies and link back to Inspiration Avenue (IA). I will comment on every entry and will surely enjoy each of your posts. Here is a linky picture to use in your post if you would like to copy it.
When I think of peace at this time of year, my visualization usually turns to doves, angels, or perhaps the nativity scene. Many beautiful images can be found at Inspiration Avenue on the web at this site. In fact, the bold type encourages "Peace on Earth, Goodwill To Men."
But what if the holidays are difficult for you, and peace is nowhere near possible? What if health issues take precedence in your mind, or you are grieving a difficult loss? What if your heart is breaking? Where is your peace, or peace of mind?
Family estrangement, especially during the holiday season, is a situation that brings many people anguish. I looked into this issue and found that this is a universal heartache, certainly not just one in my heart. And perhaps after reading this, you will not ask "WHY?" when you learn of an estrangement situation, but can just be there as support for your friend or family member.
So please indulge me, if you are so inclined, to read about some of these thoughts put together here, to gain a better understanding of why family members might estrange themselves.
From this article written by Tina Gilbertson, she hits it right on:
You must understand that the other person has a reason for wanting to reduce contact with you. It hurts to think about being rejected at all, and to accept that there's a reason you were rejected is one of the hardest things any of us can do. However, it's also necessary if you want to have a relationship with the person again. You are wrong and they are right. No qualifiers, no conditions, no compromises. How they feel is the absolute truth of the matter. This must be your attitude and your belief. People don't end important relationships on a whim; at some point they really must have felt hurt /unseen /devalued /attacked /vilified /dismissed /damaged /ignored /betrayed /rejected /disrespected by you enough to build that wall. Of course you never meant to do any such thing, but that's how they took it, and that's how they feel. That's reality. That's a fact. This is not about you. Your story is not interesting right now to the person who rejected you. They are only interested in their story. Since it was they who initiated the estrangement, your job is to be curious about them, to validate their feelings, and to be available to them in a way that they define as positive or useful.
Accept their decision. For whatever reason, no matter what you do, the other person may decide not to let you back into their life. Let them know that you accept their decision, that you genuinely wish them well, and that the door is always open if they change their mind. Acknowledge to yourself the loss of the relationship, and allow yourself to mourn. Accept the new reality of your life without that person in it. You will survive without them. Your life may look and feel different to you, but it will be yours to do with as you please. If they ever do change their mind and come knocking on your door, decide right now to let them find a peaceful, whole person on the other side.
Many parents have done everything possible to raise their kids in what they perceive to have been the right manner, but they still face excommunication from children and grandchildren. Here are possible issues involved:
Parents took an action “out of love” for the child, but it was the wrong action or the child perceives it as being wrong.
Some ex-wives or ex-husbands poison the child about the other parent. Sometimes, the child's new girlfriend or boyfriend uses similar tactics.
Some parents feel that they have spent years of their lives taking care of their children, and feel no further financial obligation. This common cause of family discord is multiplied when a child also hears that the money issue is somehow related to the parent's divorce.
Sometimes there is no obvious reason for a son or daughter to break off communication, but it would be helpful to many families if a social scientist would study this subject. It seems that one of the risk factors is divorce. Another factor is having daughters.
The central premise of this article is that all healing starts from within. The most important reconciliation is the one you make with yourself. That way, your family's willingness or unwillingness to participate in a healing process will not be able to take away your peace of mind.
An extensive listing of websites and resources relating to family estrangement can be found here.
Again, if you are seeking more help in understanding estrangement, the above cited resources can be helpful. Most large churches in urban areas have support groups on the topic of "estrangement."
Joshua Coleman, a San Francisco psychologist who is an expert on parental estrangement, says it appears to be growing more and more common, even in families who haven’t experienced obvious cruelty or traumas like abuse and addiction. Instead, parents often report that a once-close relationship has deteriorated after a conflict over money, a boyfriend or built-up resentments about a parent’s divorce or remarriage.
“We live in a culture that assumes if there is an estrangement, the parents must have done something really terrible,” said Dr. Coleman, whose book “When Parents Hurt” (William Morrow, 2007) focuses on estrangement. “But this is not a story of adult children cutting off parents who made egregious mistakes. It’s about parents who were good parents, who made mistakes that were certainly within normal limits.”
I am praying for peace this season. And I accept that as the mother of an estranged daughter, I am responsible for this estrangement. Just please don't ask my "why," because although I made many mothering mistakes, one of my two daughters is emotionally close to me while the other is distant.
Did I give too much attention to the handicapped child and not enough to the one without visible handicaps? Did I expect too much from one and not the other? If so, which one? Did I give too little, or too much? Should I have stayed in a marriage that was not good for any of us, and am now seeing consequences 30 years later? I have gone over the questions many times with both daughters, and they both give answers of "you did just fine." So somewhere in there is a mis-truth. But I still question, and yet also still don't have an answer as to why one has removed herself from the family.
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As a Christian, I believe God gave man peace through His Son. Here are a few scriptures I especially like to think about:
John 14:27....I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.
Isaiah 40:29-30...
He gives power to the weak
and strength to the powerless.
Even youths will become weak and tired,
and young men will fall in exhaustion.
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
They will walk and not faint.
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