Cancer and My Daughter

Malignant, malevolent, invasive: cancer

It has happened again, and to my daughter.  And it is breast cancer.  And how will she choose to deal with it during the normal course of Stages of Grief ?

• Denial (this isn't happening to me!)
  
• Anger (why is this happening to me?)
  
• Bargaining (I promise I'll be a better person if...)
  
• Depression (I don't care anymore)
  
• Acceptance (I'm ready for whatever comes)

She could be stuck and stay angry and depressed.  But knowing her, she will not.

Allow me to give you a background for Julie.  This is a picture of my daughter and me in her first week of  life, along with a little social history:

(the rest of the story can be read at More Magazine by clicking on this link)

Daughter Julie has been dealing with this latest diagnosis of an advanced breast cancer for about a month.  She has a myriad of medical complications to go along with this recent diagnosis.  But she has taken on this current medical problem with her usual courage and a complete lack of self pity.

So when I dare to complain, I remind myself to look to my exceptional daughter and her life.  How can one not marvel at her successes and her positive outlook?  And how could I think of ranting my despair from petty disillusionments or physical pains? 

God unceasingly reminds me of Julie, my role model for serene acceptance of what life throws at her.  I am blessed because she blesses.

There are things that we don't
want to happen but have to accept,
things we don't want to know but have to learn,
and people we can't live without but have to let go.
~ Author Unknown

Mother's Day

"Making a decision to have a child-it's momentous.

It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around

outside your body."

~Elizabeth Stone

Elizabeth Stone's quote was found on Susan's blog this morning.

Today, I want to say an even bigger "thank you" to my own children, for they have made me grow, stretch, be aware of my glaring and not so evident faults, and have taught me gratitude and a modicum of forbearance.  Thank you for being my children, Julie and Heidy.

“It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.”

 Erma Bombeck

Mother's Day is the Big Day to say "thank you" to the mothers of the world. But there are others who also lay blame when "things go wrong" with children...

Thoughts on Mother's Day from The Citizen:

While fathers, teachers, religious leaders, and numerous other elders in the society deserve acknowledgment for their roles in the nurturing of children, it is a mother’s role that is extraordinary. Mothers are naturally the primary caregivers for young children.

It is a mother who teaches how to nurture and how to love. It is through her guidance that we as individuals learn how to be empathetic and sympathetic to those around us.Today mothers have lots of routine work, and responsibilities. They are normally always busy fulfilling their children’s needs, in such a way that they forget to care for their own.

However, there is a tendency to put blame on mothers when things go wrong with children. This isn’t a new aspect. Everyday we hear how mothers are to blame when children fail to live up to our expectations.

Coffee: Flavored and Otherwise

When is the best time for a cup of coffee?  Your mood dictates the answer, but here is a thought from Bon Appetite Magazine:

The Daily Mail reports that Professor Spence and a team of experts nailed down a formula that combines great flavor (F), the perfect environment (E), the coffee container (P), the company you drink it with (C), and the time of day (T). These factors add up to the most enjoyable coffee moment (M). In other words:

M = 0.5 x F + (0.5 x E + 0.3 x P + 0.15 x C + 0.05 x T)

M = the perfect coffee moment

The study showed that the best time to have coffee is actually at 11am in a well-lighted room or outdoors in the sun with friends listening to Italian opera or any singer with a low raspy voice. (According to the research, a person's palate is most sensitive at 11am.)

11:00 AM you say?  How about the moment you awake? 

After debating for a week over the issue of whether or not to buy a one cup coffee maker, I took the plunge and ordered a Black and Decker beauty for $17 (no shipping 'cause we are Prime members) along with a bit of flavored coffee just for moi, as the husband wants no part of fu-fu java.

It should be at the doorstep Monday, along with some flavored coffees.

Carin, video podcaster at Round the Twist, is always talking about her San Marco coffee as she chats about her crafting projects, her pup, mentions her job as a night nurse, and just generally entertains with her dog begging for pats in the background.  She got me thinking that I really need my own coffee maker for just that one perfect cup of flavored coffee.  Whenever I want it!